When You Don’t Feel All Shiny and Happy

Musings

You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. —Psalm 56:8 NLT

In May, when I suffered total hearing loss in my left ear—with already poor hearing in my right ear—tears flowed as I grappled with a disorienting “new normal.” That first week, everything was muffled except for the loud humming in my head. It was all so off-kilter and distressful. I cried. A lot. Tears slipped from my eyes off and on every day—and I let them.

I wrote a little note to our email followers about my tears at the end of that week, and I was surprised that some thought tears were not good. Some worried I’d lost my faith in God. Some were concerned that showing a weepy side of me could hurt my message that God loves us and cares for us even in troubled times. A disturbing undertone made me realize that part of our Christian culture seems to expect “good” Christians to accept bad news without crying. This is not good.

The Bible records many, many instances when good people shed tears. Here are just a few of God’s people recorded in Scripture as weeping: David, Jonathan, Job, Jeremiah, Ezra, the Israelites as a group, Paul, Peter, and Jesus.* Yes. Jesus cried, and not just once. He wept at the grave of Lazarus even when He knew He was about to raise Lazarus from the dead. He wept over Jerusalem—and, in the Garden of Gethsemane, He was in deep distress over His coming crucifixion. Hebrews has a poignant verse about this.

These great men of Scripture did not have to be shiny and happy all the time to represent God well, and neither do we.

King Solomon puts this succinctly for us in Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4. “For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. … A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance (NLT).

God Himself created tears, and we need to normalize crying and sadness in Christian circles. We don’t have to be all shiny and happy all the time to somehow “prove” that God’s love provides endless contentment and peace. We show Christ’s love to the world far better when we continue to love Him through our tears, declaring He is good, even when we can’t stop crying. Part of being human is crying. It’s wired into us by our Creator. Tears release toxins and tensions from our system. In fact, it’s far worse for our health when we don’t cry, when we bottle up our emotions.

I’m way past that initial stage of grieving over hearing loss—and thankfully, much of my hearing has returned. But what carried me through those first days of sudden sensorineural hearing loss was the sure “knowing” that God welcomed my sadness and tears. After all, His Son Jesus is even named in Isaiah as a “Man of Sorrows.” God understands my tears. God doesn’t need a fake, shiny Sharon. He wants the real deal. The woman who is sometimes fearful and sometimes tearful but still following Him as best she can with His love and support and enabling. I’m very thankful I don’t have to be shiny all the time. Sometimes, we just need to cry.

Father God, I am thankful that you accept our tears and even somehow record them and collect each one. Not a tear falls that catches You unaware. Thank You for receiving me when I am a wet mess of sobs and when I am dancing in the sunlight. Thank You for Your beautiful promise that someday You will wipe away every tear from our eyes! You are a good, good Father, and I am a very grateful daughter. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

You are loved,
Sharon

 

 

 

Sweet Selah Ministries

Vision
To inspire a movement away from the belief that “busy is better”
and toward the truth of God’s Word that stillness and knowing
Him matter most—and will be reflected in more effective work and service

 Mission
To offer biblical resources and retreats that help women pause (Selah)
and love God more deeply as they know Him more intimately (Sweet)

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