“About that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who is greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?” Jesus called a little child to him and put the child among them. Then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven.” —Matthew 18:1-3 NLT 

It was a Sunday morning, a day I normally enjoy, and I was standing in church attempting to sing. Something was definitely not right. Instead of quietly and unobtrusively beating, my heart was hiccupping and jumpy. My brain felt like sludge and in danger of slipping into dizziness. What on earth was wrong with me? I wasn’t sick. No cold, no fever, no nausea. But I was Not Okay.

“I’m scared,” I whispered to the Lord. Then, as soon as the service ended, Ray took me to the emergency room. Sure enough, my blood pressure was dangerously high. I received treatment, and all is well again. However, reflecting back, I am happy that I am “growing smaller.” Even though I was feeling so unwell, I didn’t think that I needed to be tough and confident that I could muscle through whatever was wrong. God has told me over and over that I am not big. I am His child, not His equal. It’s okay to be small. And when you’re small, and your heart is doing things it should not do, it’s okay to tell your Father you are scared.

It’s fascinating to see the differing viewpoints of the disciples and Jesus in Matthew 18. They want to know who is the greatest in the kingdom. They want to grow big. We humans tend to compare ourselves to others and measure our worth based on that comparison. We’re always trying to grow more important. Jesus, on the other hand, the One who came to serve and did not even have a home in which to lay His head, tells us that the greatest are those who grow small, who become like little children.

This is good news.

When I acknowledge that I am a child …

I no longer have to be in charge. What a relief! A child relies on parents to feed them, clothe them, and direct their days. They aren’t worried about paying the bills, the rising cost of health insurance, or the tightness of the daily schedule. A child just goes with the flow. In a good home, they are fed regularly, treated to snacks, disciplined when needed, allowed to play and learn and grow, and made to rest when a nap is needed. When I work on growing small, I remember my dependency on God and rest more in His sovereignty in my daily life.

I don’t have to have all the answers. This comforts me. In so many situations, I have no solutions. I can’t judge another person’s heart and motives. I don’t know why some are healed of cancer and others die. Just like children who trust their parents in what they don’t know, I can trust the God who made and loves me. I can ask Him for an explanation as His child. Sometimes, like a child, I’ll understand it, and sometimes, it will be beyond me. Either way, He’s my good Abba-Father, and I can trust Him.

I don’t have to be devastated when I get something wrong. I’m still learning. A little child doesn’t immediately wake up at three years of age able to solve calculus problems or fix a three-course gourmet dinner. No one would expect them to. In the same way, I will not always discern correctly, make the right judgment call every time, or give perfect answers in sticky situations. I’m still learning, and I have a very patient Parent as my teacher.

I get to cling to His big hand when I am scared. It might have been impressive if I had been calm and fully at peace in church that day, but the reality was that my heart was in trouble, and I felt scared. Because God has told me over and over again that I am His child and that I must become more and more like a trusting child, I felt free to tell Him my fears and knew He would comfort me.

It’s okay to be small. Let’s become mature in our faith in Christ, growing to understand Him better. But let’s always come to Him as He calls us to: as children. “I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it” (Mark 10:15 NLT). Let’s make it our goal to grow big in our love for Him and stay small as a child in our trust and attitudes toward Him.

Father, thank You for calling me Your child. Thank You for relieving me of the burden of being in charge of my own life when so much that happens is out of my control. Thank You for caring for me so much. You even know the number of hairs on my head. Lord, I want to stay small. You are the big One, and I am content to be Yours. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.       

You are loved,
Sharon

Sweet Selah Ministries 

Vision
To inspire a movement away from the belief that “busy is better”
and toward the truth of God’s Word that stillness and knowing
Him matter most—and will be reflected in more effective work and service

Mission
To offer biblical resources and retreats that help women pause (Selah)
and love God more deeply as they know Him more intimately (Sweet)

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